I haven't blogged in three weeks. My life up until now has been a whirlwind of travel, church, and schoolwork. Yes, I do schoolwork. The main reason I haven't had time to write is--believe it or not--I have been swamped with reading and papers. I just had three papers due consecutively, one right after the other, plus weekly reading. Now there's only about 5 weeks left to the end of the semester and I have now (drumroll please) 9 more books to read, three more papers to write, and a "soul project" to complete. And then my term here at Roehampton University will officially come to an end.
Of course, those of you who have a Facebook know that it hasn't been all work and no play. If the photos are any indication, it looks as though I never have time to do any studying. But believe me, I've pulled more than my fair share of all-nighters trying to finish my work here. On the other hand, I could talk about cooking Matthew's "chicken and potato in dark sauce" recipe for the first time (I am no cook), visiting the white cliffs of Dover (Matthew Arnold anyone?), hanging out with the university students--aka 360--at CCiL, attending Central DCG (CCiL's equivalent of FCBCFV's KALEO), boiling potstickers and cooking failed crepes for my flatmates, shopping/eating/studying in Hammersmith and Central London, getting dropped off in the middle of nowhere by the 72 (it's like Russian roulette, but with buses), conferences with lecturers, seeing 007 Quantam of Solace and then searching in the rain for an Italian restaurant from Aryn's childhood, braving the brand-spanking new Westfield mall (because we're crazy masochists), our Sunday McFlurry ritual, doing laundry and scrounging around for the ever elusive 50p coins, going to a cheesy American diner for milkshakes and "a taste of home," a short visit to Oxford; field trips to Canterbury, St. Paul's Cathedral, and Westminster Abbey; a weekend trip to Paris (including but not limited to the Eiffel Tower, Montmarte, the Louvre, Notre Dame, the Sacre Coeur, Luxembourg Garden, the Sarbonne, yummy food with Stephen's Korean and French-speaking cousin, the best ice cream ever with Christina's roommate and our personal tour guide Mary, fondue in the Latin Quarter, crepes galore, and a tiny bit of boutique shopping) and my first time staying in a hostel, and finally, our day trip to Wales and the amazing Cardiff Castle. Phew. That's basically what I've been up to.
My original plan was to blog about everything and post pictures. But it all seems...unimportant at the moment. Even now, my eyes are still blurry from crying. I had a good, solid cry today. I cried out of thankfulness that my home and my family are (so far) safe from the embers of the Brea and Yorba Linda fires. I cried because the fire came so terrifyingly close to my neighborhood (you can see on the map: I live between Lambert and Birch, on the West side of Associated Rd). I cried because Ariel's family was finally able to return to their home. I cried out of grief for so many people who have lost everything to the uncontrollable flames that consumed not just the roof over their heads, but their memories of home and warmth. I cried realizing how blessed I am that so many people have shown care and concern for my family. I cried for my fellow Biola students who are suffering in other ways. I cried out to God in my state of helplessness, and He reminded me that He is good, He is sovereign, He is loving and ever-faithful.
Somehow, I can't contain the emotions welling up inside me, and they overflow into tears. There is indeed great pain and turmoil in our world. Those who think that Christianity is illogical and religious faith purely emotional are gravely mistaken. Right now, my brain is desperately fighting what I'm feeling inside--frustration at not being able to be with my family, anger at our impotence against the forces of nature, an inconsolable sense of loss and grief over those whose lives have been so heavily broken. But I have hope in my eternal home and the promise of an eternity spent with an amazing, holy, and loving God. I take comfort in knowing that He is in control of all things, and that even in suffering He can bring about tremendous blessing.
The most difficult thing for me right now is figuring out what to do now. I'm on another continent, in another country, worrying about things that are happening hundreds of miles away. But despite what happens, life here goes on. I still have books to read, papers to write, people to meet, and places to travel to. I have church events and lunch dates and daytrips already planned. How much am I allowed to enjoy myself when people back home are suffering so much? Where do I draw the line between my life back home and my life here in London? In any case, please continue to pray for those who have lost their homes and those who are fighting the fires. Pray that in all things, God may be glorified.
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